Tony White

Cyberfriend asks:

“I guess the circumstances triggered the dont exist injunction to be acted upon.

But what can determine the when?”
(end quote)




That is a very Gordian question my pommy friend. Why a person would act on the Don’t exist injunction at one point and not at another? As is hypothesised people most often will make these early decisions like the Don’t exist decision within the first 6 years of life and then it remains in their psyche and only becomes ‘operational’ when certain conditions in life arise. They have decided that suicide is a viable solution to certain life events.

One way to answer your question is to look at the different form the Don’t exist decision can take. Seven alternative suicidal decisions have been proposed:

1. If you don’t change I will kill myself
2. If things get too bad I will kill myself
3. I will show you even if it kills me
4. I will get you to kill me
5. I will kill myself by accident
6. I will almost die (over and over) to get you to love me
7. I will kill myself to hurt you.


If one finds they belong no where that may activate the Don't exist decision



These give some idea as to the life circumstances that a person will need to have before acting on their internalised Don’t exist injunction. For instance with number two decision we find that person known as the share market simpleton. This person has taken great risks in shares and now they have lost everything and this could be in their mind when - things get too bad - and thus they will act on the Don’t exist injunction.

With such people one would be questioning them on what - “If things get too bad” - means. It may be related to the loss of money, or marriage or even their reputation. Once you have identified this then you can begin to understand and make predictions about when this person will act on their Don’t exist injunction.

One could take decision number five - “I will kill myself by accident”. Enquiry into the individual’s life on what they are doing that is risky and then looking at any Child ego state magical thinking around the risks they are taking. This will again allow one to make predictions about when this person will carry out their suicidal decision.


This mother made a smart decision




Suicide decision four - “I will get you to kill me” - sometimes happens in domestic violence situations. Alternatively people on death row can have made this type of Don’t exist decision early on in life.

Decision three - “I will show you even if it kills me” - is sort of suicide from a rebellious position. In this situation one would be seeking information about the person’s current relationships and finding out who and what they would want to ‘show’. Once the information is elicited then one again is more capable of answering the question that Cyberfriend asked - How does one determine when a person will act on their Don’t exist injunction?

Graffiti

Cyberfriend makes note of an instance of self harm and suicide

“The person I discussed here...

The self harm rapidly escalated
He put his partner in hospital (she was lucky not to be killed by him)
He was imprisoned on remand,
a week later (the day after coming off suicide watch) he hung himself.

I still think him stabbing himself was manipulation,
not sure whether hanging himself was.

Though in honesty he did his partner a favour,
as she in now safe and doesnt need to go into hiding.

So how does his original self harm fit within your categories?”
(end quote)



Suicide and self harm are two completely different psychological processes although often the layman puts them together.

Having said that one can have three groups:
Those who are suicidal and not self harming
Those who are self harming and not suicidal
Those who are both suicidal and self harming

So some people will have both but they still involve quite different psychological motivations

The truly suicidal individual has the definitive feature of having a Don’t exist injunction. This is the psychological process that makes for the ‘true’ suicidal person. A message they have in their head, that for some reason they, others or the world would be better off if they were dead.



Self harming has nothing to do with the Don’t exist injunction. Instead it serves other psychological functions such as I showed in my original list:

1. Gang behaviour tattooing type of self harm
2. To make self feel real. Dissociation, detached from reality. Cutting closes the gap.
3. To make self feel something. No feelings at all just numb
4. Tension relief and pressure stress build up
5. Physical expression of emotional pain. Cutting provides concrete evidence of pain
6. Cutting as self nurturing. Allows caring of self. Munchausen Syndrome
7. Self punishment and self hate
8. Manipulation and to get attention

None of this includes a Don’t exist injunction nor is it about attempting to kill self. Instead the self harm is being done for alternative reasons as I have listed.



However there are people who do make suicidal statements and gestures who are not suicidal. These people are not suicidal as it is never their goal to kill self and they do not have a Don’t exist injunction. If they do die by their own hand then it is an accident not a suicide as their intent was not to kill self. Some make these gestures for manipulation of some kind. So people can use both self harm and suicidal gestures for manipulative reasons.

Regarding the person you described who was on remand in prison I can make some guesses as I did work in a prison where I ran the suicide watch programme for three years. Those who are making suicidal gestures for manipulative reasons are usually seeking to get onto suicide watch and mostly are not the truely suicidal person.



The inmate you describe was on suicide watch. He must have then made all the right noises and behaviours to appear to be not at current risk and then he is taken off suicide watch. The next day he completes a suicide by hanging in a prison which is usually not an easy thing to do. So he must have done some prior planning which means he probably made a decision to kill self days before and then simply played out all the necessary moves and completed his goal.

This has all the hallmarks of the truly suicidal person who has a Don’t exist injunction. So it is unlikely that it was a suicidal gesture to manipulate the system in some way. This means he falls into the group that are both suicidal and self harming.

Graffiti